Poem: Slipstream

It is obvious now that I have left the dream.
You my friend with all your hip have lost the slipstream.
No matter how you break it down this I know for sure.
You are in need even more of my most remedy cure.
So I shall give you a taste of this most humble pie.
My hope is that it will wake you up from this lie.

I was never your friend nor enemy despite these feelings.
You most intensely have felt both but no mater our dealings.
I know we would have been big but if our egos were submit.
This happens I am sure because of the flow that goes to the pit.
I speak no lie now for that truth manufactured has been built.
All seemingly part of one hyped and elaborate but soiled quilt.

The stream is now done and the sounds of silence won.
For no matter how you spin this tale it is so very done.
In the aftermath one thing is for sure your now in the zone.
I wish you all the best no matter how short lived the throne.
I have from this learned that no matter what will be said.
I am responsible the most for my part on this giant misread.


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Why Tolkien Still Matters

“But where our hearts truly lie is in peace and quiet and good tilled earth.”

― JRR Tolkien


The work of J.R.R. Tolkien seems to at times forget about his legacy. No, not his legacy of being the father of modern fantasy fiction but the legacy of his philosophy. It is easy to look at Tolkien and only see him as a literary giant rather then somebody who sought to not only create a new mythology but whole new society. It is far more easier to focus on the fantasy and not so much the real world idealism he placed in the pages.

For Tolkien, he did not look to create Middle-earth just as place to escape the woes of this world. He created the world to restore what he most certainly thought was lost. Theology, culture, economics and politics were very much part of the organic framework in the societies in Middle-earth. For Tolkien his desire to escape into Middle-earth was not because he wanted to leave behind the real world rather the dreary and unimaginative one of modern times that replaced it. He sought not just high fantasy but actually the simple and ordinary aspects of the Agrarian society. This totally seen in the Shire and the hobbits. To him he wanted both the fantastical and the humdrum aspects of Middle-earth. He wanted the once pristine natural world along with the beautiful hallmarks of medieval society. His work while a great piece of imaginative art is actually less fascinating without his philosophy embedded into it.

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The truth is, Tolkien’s idealism of Middle-earth is still very much needed even more now then it ever was. As destructive the modern age was with industrialization, war and materialism. The post-modern age is even more destructive in a more dull way with globalism, digitization, agnosticism, neo-liberal secularism, proxy wars & corporate mass consumerism. Now more than ever, we need to escape to Middle-earth. A place where not only will we see the good green earth but small local communities thriving. Just as Bilbo longed to see mountains again we also long for a time where the core fundamental values of Western European and Christian culture is at the fore front. As more people becomes slaves to the digital age and social media we need to unplug and have a good pipe, an old book and a roaring fire to keep us warm. We need to flee our constructs of technological terrors and remember the warmth of the sun on our back as work in our gardens or roam the woods. There is need for all of us to go on adventure just like Bilbo being thrust out our hobbit holes and into the world. We need to see the faith of Gandalf in our leaders in our communities and families. We need to remember the goodness of Samwise Gamgee and the devotion of Aragorn to his friends. We need tell tales over large ales and sing and dance. We need to remember the good and simple things of life.

We need all of this now because people are more at each other’s throats more than ever before. Now more then ever the curse of Smaug has come to mark us with greed. We have lost sight of what matters the most and Middle-earth is our way back. The philosophy of Tolkien is what can bring us back to our roots and take us back to the fundamental truths we all knew as wee little hobbits.

Poem:The Wandering Ranger

Some might ask me what does it mean to be a Wandering Ranger?
Surely nothing more than being a stranger
who must now find peace in nature.

Yes I love this beautiful creation
but I seek it now out of frustration.
For just as Tolkien’s sons of Arnor
I have been ever so keen to explore.

Lord grant me mercy for this road I must tread.
I am indeed wandering this world looking to be fed.
For it is my lot in this life to find no place to call home.
Indeed I seek it only in the holiest tome.


What purpose does it for me find favor.
In a world run by a terrible slaver.
Hear me now one cannot two masters serve.
The one of heaven is certainly not of this earth.

Fads and foolish trends do I lament.
When inside the church they find cement.
I am only reminded of what was that pure faith.
That most holy thing now gone only left a wraith.

Give me grace from above as I start this path.
Things have been done that will have an aftermath.
No longer silent can I be about this charade,
Oh my heart is burdened with how many swayed.

So a ranger’s life I now have finding solace in the wild.
Most certainly it seem evident ever since I was child.
I tread ever on the trail finding shelter in the ruins.
Of what most certainly was the church’s undoing.

My sadness is for the bride
and her ever troubling slide.
When she courts the wisdom of men
she so ever abandons the love of Him.

I am now but a mere image of the man
who so faithfully felt part of this clan.
I seek a place where my faith can grow
destined for isolation like Thoreau.


So I wander on with no bed to lie on
Ever so waiting for the rise of dawn.
Wanting only to let your light show me the way.
Until that prophesy is fulfilled on the last day.

Why People Don’t Get Religion

But the natural man receiveth not the things of the Spirit of God: for they are foolishness unto him: neither can he know them, because they are spiritually discerned.

1 Corinthians 2:14

“The Christian ideal has not been tried and found wanting. It has been found difficult; and left untried.”

― G.K. Chesterton, What’s Wrong with the World

Whether you know or not the people who fail to understand religion are the same people who fail at speaking on it. Religion is a topic that either intimidates people or even worse makes them feel qualified to speak on it. It either is a burden to people who struggle with getting the point or it inflates their ego which is only boosted by the amount they reduce from it. Religion is a fine wine that can only be discussed with people who have a mind for it. It is not a slam its an objective fact.



Part of the problem with openly discussing religion is that it either invites simple minded people to dismiss it or reduce it. I recently found this out the hard way once again. The truth about this topic is that makes one go crazy when confronted with this fact about people who constantly don’t get religion.

Unlike topics like your favorite movie or sports team, religion demands you know the facts of it. People often make the false assumption that religious discourse is just opinion but it is not true. Your reason for liking the Miami Dolphins or My Big Fat Greek Wedding is based on your subjective take on the material. Art can cause a subjective reading and it can be justified to a degree. However, your taste has little to do with objective and clerical facts. Whether you like Mass in Latin or English is immaterial to what official doctrine of the Roman Catholic Church is. Folks often assume that because you have a subjective opinion on why you dislike something that somehow how things in regards to religion is subjective. For example you may like how Mormons focus on family. That is an opinion but you cannot deny that Joseph Smith took the Book of Ra and renamed it the Book of Abraham. You may think it is wrong for churches to spend money on buildings than using for the poor. That does negate that Calvinists believe in double predestination. Often times people take their skewed opinions and make it equate things it should not. Whether you regard yourself religious or not there is a proper way to speak on matter because we can’t make up facts and claim things that simply are not true. I understand why we have this problem it is a by product of the Enlightenment and American individualism. People equate what they think and believe that it means all things must submit to it. It is a virus of the mind that causes people not to understand how express proper ideas. On top of that you add the technology and social media which creates more people thinking that opinions in particular their opinions matter more than objective truth. I may not agree with Buddhism but does not grant me to say things that are not true.

Religion is something that people often mischaracterize as well. For example they may say they are not religious or that they do not like to talk religion but then often speak about why they dislike organized religion. This stems from people thinking that religion only means talking about what your church believes. No wonder people often think wrong things about religion, like how it causes divides. Religion only divides because people disagree, that is not because religion to succumbent to opinion but often some speak false and others speak truth. Even if I am not a Muslim I know there is orthodoxy and heterodoxy in that religion. People disagree because one is either reducing or reinventing. Truly the problem with religion is that some fervently uphold it and others want to reinvent it. Even if you disagreed with that concept you still have to admit that even something like sports can divide people. We never hear people say “I can’t talk about sports because it divides people”. The truth is that people know even if instinctively that sports is a subjective thing. You like your team for relative terms. Also people subscribe or reject to authority in sports and that’s the heart of the matter.

Religion demands loyalty and faithfulness and often people want to break away from that. I would even admit that as my religion indicates that it is our sinful nature that causes this. People reject or want to redefine or objectify it. When people’s whims are culled by truth or authority which speaks for truth it drives us to be angry and insufferable.

In the end what matters most is to find those who can understand this and ignore those who can’t. It essentially comes down to world views and whether you deny objective authority in truth. Like I said I recently found this truth to be evident again. The people who often disregard or poorly give its rightly needed scholasticism it becomes utter cringe.

Wasted Time


“If you set out to be liked, you would be prepared to compromise on anything at any time, and you would achieve nothing.”


~ Margaret Thatcher

After much consideration i have decided to fully leave dlive! IN FACT I JUST DELETED MY ACCOUNT.

In July of 2019 I was in a bad spot. My wife just lost her job and I was being crippled with an array of health issues. I got into streaming because it was rather easy and it allowed me at the time to put aside my problems. I became obsessed with streaming and getting the goal of affiliate. In all this time though I compromised my ideals and allowed myself to be in association with people who regularly spat in the face of the things I held dear. Now I understand why they did this and in truth I hold no ill wishes towards them. I know the fault was in my choosing to associate myself with people who did not build me up in the good and moral things of life.

I began to accept behavior and language from people I did not myself find to be a benefit. The simple truth is that a lot of people on Dlive were antithetic to the things I treasured and knew to be fundamental to life. Now I do not want to paint a broad brush here and say there was no one there who was nice or understanding but the nature of the beast sort of speak was evident and for myself I began to see the writing on the wall.


I truly feel that in order to grow on a platform like Dlive you can’t talk truth about religion or politics. Do not get me wrong there are people there who do talk about these topics but many of these people have embedded their communities from other platforms. Nothing organic to Dlive was ever going to allow for free expression about what is truth. For example I criticized how another streamer’s dissonance. It was not taken well. I get that I probably did no good service by publicly speaking about it but I did not feel it would have been allowed for me to speak on his chat panel. It was a sad bookend to something I should have seen a mile away. This is part of the reason I have to step away from Dlive. It made me make poor choices and while that is not on Dlive per say it is just systemic of why I can’t be on that platform.

So here is where I stand on the whole matter. I will not be streaming on Dlive. If I stream it would be on another site but here is the problem Dlive was a much better solution then Twitch or Mixer. So now all you people over can now in your chat openly speak about how much you hate me despite what I tried to do to help support you. The wasted time is what makes my stomach turn. I wasted my time and my mind with some of these people. The truth is I was not allowed to be me because I knew deep down I would piss so many people off. I trigger people and the worst ones do me as well. Its like oil and water. So the reality is I am now just going to focus on writing, my podcasts, and making videos. I guess some of these people can follow me to Youtube and continue to give me grief there and I guess that is their time to waste.

In summary I realize that the content I wanted to create was not something best served on a site that focused only on streaming. As nice as some people where on Dlive the majority of them were toxic trolls and fake egomaniacs. I wish nothing but the best for many people there. It is sad because some of these people I was deluding myself to think they could ever be a real friend let alone a real person. So ends this chapter of my online life. The people who truly want to seek me out will know how to find me.